Today's the day that determines our future!...well, one of the days anyway. Rank Lists are due at 9 pm. Eek! My heart jumps when I think about it, my adrenaline starts pumping, and I feel riddled with anxiety...and excitement! After today, there is nothing else that we can say or do to change the outcome on Match Day. After today, it is really up to God.
It's hard to explain the emotions I feel as we approach Match Day. My understanding is that if you have gone through the match process, you understand; if you haven't gone through it, it is unlike anything else. Despite my anxiety, Aaron and I take comfort that God is now in control. Over the last few weeks, and especially the last few days, I have succumb to selfish prayers: His will be done, but that that would mean a place us at our first choice school. Period.
My anxiety comes from the possibility of leaving the comfort zone I am so comfortable in: our friends, my job, the community of support that God has blessed us with. The covenant ring that was given to me before I got married, and then gave to Aaron, read this passage from the Book of Ruth in Hebrew: "Where you go, I will go". I will follow Aaron wherever he goes, wherever God places us...it is a commitment to God (as He is the one that has given us the discernment to know where to apply, interview, and rank) and a commitment to my husband...only shall death do us part. But it is still hard to grasp that I may end up leaving loved ones in Augusta, and could be moving further away from my family!
Over the last several weeks I have been teaching my Sunday School Kindergartners about the Armor of God. The Breastplate of Righteousness, the Shield of Faith, the Belt of Truth, etc... we have been teaching these ridiculous (ridiculously cool that is!) songs to help them remember the Bible verses, which are rather catching and I sing them randomly throughout my day. It is hard to portray in a blog the stomping, clapping, shouts, and motions that each of these songs requires. ;) The fact that they get stuck in my head is quiet funny, but it is also a great reminder of what I should be remembering during this time of doubt, insecurity, etc. I must have "put on" the shield of faith and belt of truth to know and believe that God has a place planned out for Aaron and me wherever his residency position takes us; that God is already preparing for us that place, with a supportive and encouraging community of believers; that God is building us a group of friends that will become our family. He did all of these things for us in Augusta and He will take care of us and provide for our needs wherever we are. We are His children.
Pray for us over the next several weeks: that we would not be riddled with anxiety; that we would trust in God's plan for us; that we would cherish the moments that we have with our friends in Augusta; that our marriage would be strengthened as we prepare for whatever God has for us; and that those around us would be understanding of the drastic change that may be happen in our lives come March 17th.
Until next time!
Anna :)
22 days until Match Day!
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